Reasons teens and a families seek counseling.
Only healthy people seek counseling. Unhealthy people just suffer through it.
To all my snowbird friends, to the adventures, the fearless friends excited for the day they leave the safety of the nest: take heart, take hope! To Jerry and Sue, Mark, Jim and Julie, my parents, Don, Dixon and Julie, Scott and to all the other adventurers out there, take heart, take hope!
From my warm house and big bed I commend you, I admire you. I want to be more like you. Not fearless, but courageous despite the fear. Stepping out into the unknown, being very afraid, yet doing it anyway. Those of us left behind only dream of the adventure, the stories that will unfold before you and within you. And we are VERY JEALOUS.
You will have blowouts, that belt will break, you will get water drips we’re not supposed to and you’ll ask why is that wet?! it won’t start sometimes, it won’t hold weight supposed to, it will break at the most inopportune times. So what?! SO WHAT?!
May you find peace in the process, enjoy the journey for what it is. An adventure. And of course, adventure has cost. It always has a cost. Cheap it adventure is no adventure at all. To sacrifice something is what makes it great! Don’t be afraid to give it your all!
Life in the office, life on the couch, life at a movie is no life at all! May we all be shaken out of our comfort zones, pushed to new discoveries. New wisdom about ourselves, about the world around us and about God.
The best lives are meant to be like your motorhome trip across the country, or sailing the open ocean to Bermuda, or in the middle of nowhere on Lake Superior. Like all great journeys, our best lives are full of hope, terror, patience and of course ecstasy.
Thank you for inspiring me to jump from the safety of warm nest into the unknown. Together we dive blindly into the mystery, but it will surely be better than the safety, better than the mundane. May you roll with the punches, and fix it as it comes. Because you know it’s coming, you just don’t know when.
May you laugh at the struggles ahead. May you trust your unknown future to your known God.
Rediscover joy, hope and peace.
Beginning the journey to a better you. The first steps are the hardest.
A few thoughts on the process of learning something new. Pondering the difficulites and subtelties involved in the act of learing that we all experiance on a regular basis.
Learning is HARD! There is no simple short cut away around it. It can become easier with a great teacher, but never the less, the actually connecting of those circuits in your brain is tough work. Muscle memory, memorizing new information, learning a new skill, or even just upgrading an old one. It’s all tough.
As an aside before getting into it, I’m going to try get through this whole video without saying “you gotta” because no one wants to hear that. This is not advice for what you should do, just some observations about what (we all) already do.
As you can see I am wearing glasses, but what you cant’ see is that I just spent the last hour and a half of my life with the wonderful people at Infinity Eye Care repeatedly jamming my own finer into my eye.
I tried this morning to put in and take out contact lenses, and it was a fail…. well at least a “not success yet” experience. I have never willingly poked my own eye, and learning how to do just that: Thus far has been incredibly: Demanding, Exhausting, frustrating, and just plain difficult.
As I was attempting to suction a foreign object into one of a limited number of wholes in my body (which I generally do my absolute best to guard and protect) I was thinking more than the normal person about the process of learning a new thing.
Learning anything, how to read, how to play the guitar, how to stitch up a gunshot wound, is difficult. Most of us are not naturally good at all things on the fist try. Period, were just not. Most of us have a bit of a learning curve on most things.
So, refections upon the exercise of learning while poking my self repeatedly:
A1: its hard. Its hard for all of us, know that. Internalize that, normalize that for yourself, and be patient with others as they are learning around you.
B2: Learning is seldom Fun! That A HA moment when it clicks can be rewarding, but the LOOONG amount of work it takes to achieve that light bulb is not “pleasant”
My old wrestling coach use to tell us to embrace and enjoy the the “thrill of the drill” Because that thing we are attempting to learn takes (not exaggerating) hundreds of repetitions to finally get it without any effort.
C3: Learning takes incredible endurance. It boggles my mind that humans have been able to learn anything at all EVER. You gotta.. No! …We all need to keep coming back to our challenge hour after hour, and day after day, and even year after year.
AND when we are in the middle of said learning, It is important that we press on during that training session as long as possible. Instead of punching out after just 10 minutes of trying.
Contacts won’t be easy/ a mindless part of my morning routine for a while.
But I sincerely look forward to the day when it is! And Lastly: Staying positive is HUGE. It is so easy to fail (repeatedly) then get down on yourself. Keep at it. It seems like it’s just as much work to keep a positive attitude in the process as it is to simply do thing thing. It took more work for me to stay positive than it did working the contact. I hope I see you again soon, and I hope when we meet, I am not wearing these glasses.
Recently I was able to spend the holiday with my favorite 3 year old, and well, one of my favorite people ever, my nephew Jonathan.
Wife generous gift giver: helicopter ball toy complete with lights, and a laser, it flys around the room and if/when it inevetlabuy bumps into something it automatically shuts off.
Off/On Off/on Jonathan would scream in delight as I reset this toy to continue playing.
great but for every 6 minutes of playing time, we needed to plug it back in for… about (in a 3 Y/o’s eyes) Eternity, but to us normal human beings, about 15 minutes.
Jonathn is 99% of the time, the nicist, most well adjusted delightful little guy an uncle could ever ask for. My brother/sister in law: crushing it as parents. They deserve a medal….. actually all parents deserve a medal or a trophy or an all expense paid vacation without kids or something.
Anyway. We plugged in the helicopter.
waiting for eternity caused as you might have guessed, a complete meltdown.
Instantly, Raw unfitered disgust frustration impatience, “I want it my way now” then collapse in a mush of tears and limp boneless flesh on the floor.
As a kid, these reactions these raw emotions are normal, part of the childhood experience but as adults, we’re expected to lock it up. Show no emotion Remain stock, unchanged by the events of the world around us.
The truth is that I feel just like jonathan sometimes when I don’t get my way. I know it’s silly, and thats just the way the world works but I’m still really upset by it.
Jonathan knew in his head that the toy needed to be charged every few minutes but that didn’t change the fact that his heart hurt when things didn’t shake out the way he wanted them to go.
when pulling this limp pile of tears and face juices into my arms, holding his exaugsted quiver body against mine, I knew what he was feeling. because I feel it too. That same overwhelmed, exoughsted anxiety that grips my whole being. I know it too. I feel it just as often as he does. only I’m expected to keep it all together.
When health insurance costs me a week’s salary, when my hours are getting cut, when no-one wants to buy my product, when I can’t seem to communicate with my wife, when political parties are crumbling around me, when the furness goes out and we max out the credit card, when my parents get sick
all I want to do is crumple to the floor in a motionless pile of sniffles and choppy breaths.
I held him In my arms and tell him I get it. Life is hard sometimes. I don’t always get what I want either. I love you buddy. I’ve got you. I know I know
I love you.
Growing up is all about those hard moments. Getting short changed or beaten down by the world. We all have em, some people’s problems are WAY bigger than others, so many people have it way worse than me! But weither its a toy helacopter, a health care bill, a lost job or a lost loved one.
That hurt. Pain is universal.
The best of us seem to have felt it all too real, it has molded them shaped them in to the men and women who are there for the rest of us, holding us close, reminding us that I get it. Life is hard sometimes. I don’t always get what I want either. I love you buddy. I’ve got you. I know I know
I love you.